


はじまりのとき (a new beginning)

by inotherwords



Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Community: scifiland, Ficlet, Hopeful Ending, Introspection, M/M, Songfic, Wordcount: 100-500
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-02
Updated: 2012-05-02
Packaged: 2017-11-04 18:17:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/396786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inotherwords/pseuds/inotherwords
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Logic in the absence of Vulcan leaves room for new possibilities.</p>
            </blockquote>





	はじまりのとき (a new beginning)

**Author's Note:**

> The title and lyrics stem from a song by Ayaka, a Japanese singer/songwriter. The name of the song translates to 'a new beginning' in English. You can find the song [here](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kt9pyTj74Y4). English translation by me.
> 
> Written for a April 2012 challenge at scifiland. I heard this song and, well, Spock wouldn't quiet.

_sadness turns into kindness  
and separation harkens new encounters_

An insult. A clenched fist. A large absence. All emotions. Detachment would have been healthy, but there's no one left to raise an eyebrow. These emotions are a kindness, a beginning.

_I wonder if we become adults by repeating these things?_

Of age in one culture, far from it in another. What does it mean to keep these traditions when it means losing yourself in the process?

_what do I believe and where am I headed?  
traveling toward a future only myself can know._

Gone, gone, gone. Expectations and illogical half-breed synonyms along with inarguable knowledge and the only link toward that illogical future. In the midst of loss, a new link is forged.

_life, I am living.  
even floundering with a heart I call myself  
life, a yesterday where I cried  
a yesterday where I stood still  
connected to every tomorrow  
if a door opens in front of my eyes  
it's a new beginning_

A new role, an unexpected family. Logic doesn't wash away the loss, but instead turns it into something raw and workable. Logic keeps it along side and allows the first step forward.

_when times are painful  
I know it's your existence that's important  
it's true that sadness and joy  
adjoin each other, right?_

'Bittersweet.' 'Good from the bad.' You have said this and more in the way that humans have to put one foot in front of the other and take that step when the logic you call emotion makes decision difficult. 'Grateful,' you have said, 'Humbled.' Those are my emotions too, the ones you translate, spoken without words.

_what do I choose and where do I cross?  
believing in someone other than ourselves._

Surak and logic brought me this before. Memories of my mother, and continuations of those lessons will be what bring me into the future. She showed me fragments of human culture; but you, you show me what it is to be human.

_life, living it together  
there is a power born from our connected hands  
life, lamented yesterdays  
yesterdays I ran from  
are connected to every tomorrow  
gently, I present my weakness to you  
a new beginning_

"You should stop smiling so much."

A pause which I know you follow by a grin.

My eyebrow lifts itself slightly higher.

Your grin widens.

"I know, I know, you don't smile...but you do. You taught me to see it, you know."

And you teach me how to do it.


End file.
